The Faces of Rock: Composite Images of 30 Classic Bands

A luxury facial hair grooming company called West Coast Shaving got sick of lead singers getting all of the attention.  The other band members count too, and often are more handsome or at least rock a better beard!

And we all know how many of the best bands our planet has ever been graced with held themselves back bickering about who should get the most attention (I'm looking at you, Yes).

It's like the joke about the guy wanting to play both Jesus and Judas on Jesus Christ Superstar.  It doesn't work like that, and no, you can't be the bassist and vocalist, we already have a vocalist, Chris Squire!

With this in mind, West Coast Shaving wanted each legendary rock band out there to have a "face" for everyone to swoon over.  You can't rewrite history or human preference for one member, but a little science magic let's us see what a brand new member would look like who is a genetic blend of all of them!

From the Beatles, Metallica, Pearl Jam, The Who, Pink Floyd, The Doors... heck, all of them except Yes, and that's their own fault... their genetic superiors are quite handsome.  I mean, I'm hotter than all of them by far, but you know.  This can't always be about me.

The Faces of Rock!

I swear, the Led Zeppelin face is a clone of Jim Sturgess!  Then again, so is The Beatles.  Guns N' Roses looks a little too much like Mark Wahlberg.  Pearl Jam is none other than Russell Crowe!  Metallica kind of looks like Bam Margera.  I seent it!  The Smashing Pumpkins face looks like he's ready to transcend to another plane of existence.  The Green Day face is just flat out unsettling.

The Faces of Rock composite graphic

Thanks to West Coast Shaving for creating the original graphic, and for giving me nightmares for the rest of my life based on that Green Day face.

I'd like to see someone do one of these using all of the girl bands out there like Destiny's Child, Spice Girls, Fifth Harmony, and the other ones I can't think of because I'm not a teenage boy any more.  If anyone did one of all the boy bands like N'Sync, Backstreet Boys and 98 Degrees, I'm pretty sure that would break the internet for a solid couple of days.  The rest of us would never get a date again, not that I ever do, even though everyone tells me I look just like George Clooney.

Imagine taking five of these mashed up people above and putting them into one musical supergroup, assuming that mashing them together transfers and coalesces their musical knowledge and skill too.  I'd pick The Beatles, The Eagles, Creedence Clearwater Revival, Queen, and Journey, personally, but only if they record the most epic progressive rock concept album ever.  If Yes had enough sense to have made it onto this graphic I'd have chosen them, but nope, they have to constantly ruin it for us super fans.  Can you tell that I'm just a little bit salty about it?